Wednesday, September 01, 2021

Sunday, October 21, 2018

Central Mass Brew Tour


Rippers Foliage Gravel Grinder

aka Central Mass Brew Tour

The Crew

This band of adventurers was the perfect crew to enjoy a perfect fall day in the woods and remote roads of Central Mass.

  • Phillip - enjoyed riding and hanging with his friends. Probably deserved a mutiny, but was happy everyone got back safely, with only mild scratches and sore muscles.
  • Josh - spilled my beer at Homefield, but I let it slide because he is so much fun to ride with.
  • Mark -  rode an earlier and awfuller version of this route with me last year. His feedback helped make this updated route much, much better.
  • Anthony - loves these big mixie rides, adding to the fun at K2R2, the All-Day Mixie, and the Central Mass Brew Tour in the last 12 months.
  • Matt - channeled the Sassler method and killed all the climbs.
  • Guy - channeled the Blackman method and rode the dirt fast and fearless.
  • Olivier - rode his full-fendered Diverged over every obstacle, no problem. Like all of us, he hated the bushwhack through a quarter mile of brambles at the end of the ride.

A special note about Austin and his friend Ben:

  • Ben is a strong road rider, but this was his first time on dirt. We took him over some fun, easy trails similar to Battle Road in Lexington. But we also took him over some fun, challenging trails similar to the Fells in Winchester. White knuckle descents, baby heads, loose rocky climbs, puddles, ankle deep mud. Ben rode it all, but admitted that 30 miles of mixie was harder than the century he rode last weekend. After a late lunch at Homefield Kitchen and Brewery, Ben decided to call it a day and hopped in the car with Austin to make some purchases at Tree House.
  • Austin was another hero of the day, even though he didn't even get on his bike. On Wednesday, Austin fell in the Fells, suffering a deep gash in his knee that required stitches. Rather than bail on our Saturday ride, he drove to Tree House to sweep the course and carry our gear. Or he tried to, since the route traversed many "You shall not pass" sections that frustrated his ability to sweep the ride. Austin thinks I should have warned him he couldn't drive the course. I think he should have known that any mixie route I design is going to treat any sign saying "Do not enter" or "No outlet" as a challenge. OF COURSE you can't drive a car on my routes. Sometimes you can't ride a bike on my routes.


The Route

The ride was 50 miles with stops at Rapscallion, Homefield, and Tree House. We were definitely in need of refreshment after riding the challenging trails through Wells State Park and Brimfield State Forest.

The road sections were scenic and the dirt sections took us to the Twilight Zone (an eerie area in the woods with street signs, but no streets) and the mellow Grand Trunk Trail past the Westville Dam. Another mellow trail took us past the East Brimfield Dam.

Route: https://ridewithgps.com/routes/28649225

Alternate Hero Finish: https://ridewithgps.com/routes/28791433 - takes trails to Tree House, avoiding Rte 20, but requires hiking for anyone not named Danny Macaskill or Peter Sagan

If it's not on Strava it didn't happen: https://www.strava.com/activities/1917255509

The error

Near the start of the ride, we made a fortuitous wrong turn in Wells State Park and rode a mile of fun trail before finally admitting we were off course and riding the trail back to the route. No one minded the extra miles or the backtrack because it was exactly the kind of trail we seek out for mixie rides.

At the end of the ride, we weren't so fortunate. After 49.5 miles of near perfect riding, we reached a critical decision point. We could ride 2.5 miles on roads to the finish in the lower lot of Tree House. Or we could attempt the 8/10ths of a mile Hero Section trail that ends right at the Tree House tasting room. It took some coaxing on my part, but the incentive of avoiding Route 20 and the promise of sweet trails after the hike up the power line convinced the group to give it a try.

The power line was as unrideable as advertised. I offered a 4-pack of Tree House to anyone who could ride up the steep, rocky trail. Many tried, but no one succeeded. Some claimed that they could do it on a mountain bike, but I'm skeptical. The offer of a 4-pack still stands for the first Ripper to get up that trail on any kind of bicycle without dabbing (eBikes are not bikes).

The trail finally flattened out and we were able to ride again. So far, so good. Then the fatal error. I knew the sweet, sweet trail to Tree House was just ahead. I also knew it was very faint and hard to find. My Garmin told me it was 100 yards ahead, but my eyes told me that it was 100 yards downhill and that there was a faint trail leading off in the right direction without going downhill. I decided not to risk riding downhill only to climb back up if this faint track was in fact the trail. The one time MFG was right, I ignored it. I led the intrepid band into the woods...and we were lucky to come back out. Instead of a fun finish to the brewery, we endured a death march through deadfall and brambles. People fell, clothing and skin was torn, bikes were damaged. It was not fun! Uncharacteristically, I even suggested turning back and getting back on route, but the music from the brewery provided a siren song urging us on. It just got worse and worse, but we finally clawed our way out of the woods and the shimmering oasis became a reality. We slaked our thirst and over the next half hour, many of the astonished people who saw us emerge from the dense woods came over to ask us what exactly the hell we were doing.

It was an awesome day with a terrible finish, that just adds to the reputation of Ripper Mixies. We go where no sane cyclist dares go.


Addendum

Tree House has great beer, no doubt. It also has a beautiful setting next to a nature preserve, a gorgeous pavilion, and an awesome painting behind the bar of a tree house heavy in the use of chiaroscuro, a la Thomas Cole and the Hudson River school. Somehow despite all this excellence, the Tree House Brewery experience leaves me cold, metaphorically and physically. Just one example: Shivering after our epic ride, we were drawn to the heat lamps under the pavilion. Unfortunately, their tantalizing flames were for show and provided no warmth.

Tree House
Thomas Cole

In contrast, our lunch at Homefield Kitchen and Brewery provided hot food, good beer, loud music, and a warm, homey feel. We chatted with the owner / head brewer. The waitresses were delightful, friendly and sassy. A guy in the band came outside and offered to sell Mark a helmet which he found abandoned on our table when we left to continue the ride.

Even Rapscallion was a better experience than Tree House, even though it was infested with disc golf posers that drove Austin to drink. The beers may not be as celebrated, but after a hard ride Rapscallion beers tasted pretty damn good. Plus we got to sit in a welcoming and friendly tasting room instead of waiting in line and shivering next to fake fires.

Enough words

Enjoy the photos and videos from our ride...